Bethylene's Top Ten Most Serious, Most Thought-provoking Movies

Water
Because beautiful prostitute stories don't get any sadder.

The Man in the Gray Flannel Suit
Because you cannot outrun your past.

Paris, je t'aime
Because the sad stories are interspersed with happy stories, so the experience never lapses into bathos.

Osama
Because periods are evil.

Guess Who's Coming to Dinner
Because, once again, Sidney Poitier is the man.

The Yacoubian Building
Because everyone's a victim.

Annie Hall
Because we never really listen.

Volver
Because we most often lie to ourselves.

Gandhi
Because he fathered a nation.

La Historia Oficial
Because evil government child-stealers also abuse their wives.

Also really serious: Inch'Allah Dimanche, To Kill a Mockingbird, Brodeuses (Sequins), Khoya Khoya Chand

Bethylene's Top Ten Most Favorite, Most Thrilling Motion Pictures

Paradise Now
Because nothing's scarier than running around Nablus with explosives strapped to your chest. Except perhaps filming in Nablus, which can get your film crew shot at by Israelis, kidnapped by Palestinians, and nearly blown up by a land mine.

Minority Report
Because everybody dreams of replacing their eyeballs.

Nosferatu
Because horror films are even scarier when they're silent and dusty.

The Interpreter
Because the plot is so complex.

Sunset Boulevard
Because dead kept men tell the best tales.

The Lives of Others
Because you never know who's listening in.

V for Vendetta
Because the best way to steal a woman's identity is to shave off her hair.

The Count of Monte Cristo
Because they spiced up the plot nicely while doing away with the Count's creepy relationship with Haydée.

Hero
Because it's just so pretty.

In the Heat of the Night
Because Sidney Poitier is the man.

Also really thrilling: High Noon, Casino Royale, The Bourne Identity, Sweet Smell of Success, The Others, The Maltese Falcon, The Phantom of the Opera (1925; part of it's in Technicolor!), Bunny Lake Is Missing